I need to scare my neighbors away from my porch :)?

why not befriend them an discuss , with them what is bothering u take heart my friend , i might not be feeling what ur feeling . because (only who feels it knows it). but i think that it can be resolved in a better way than to want to scare them , who knows maybe one day they might be the one to rescue u fr something we all dont know the future so we must love our neighbours. good luck.